so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
