Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
