Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I just gargled with NyQuil
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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