I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
