it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Randomize
