called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
