you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
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