He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize