Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
