is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
its liver damage thursday
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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