No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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