you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
