this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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