Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
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