I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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