Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
