About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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