How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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