come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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