just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
What a dumb baby whore.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
