Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize