if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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