I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
