shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I'm really busy with my period
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