This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
