I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
