After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
