this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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