Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
