Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
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