We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
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