i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
