just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize