Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
