You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Randomize
