it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
