I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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