Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
