I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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