GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
