1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
