Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
