It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
look no pants
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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