I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I love having hate sex.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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