No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
