he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
