i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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