Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
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