U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
