you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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